break me down.
watch me fall.
bury me alive.
killing me with your words.
all this were meant to be.
i m meant to fall.

Current Mood: discontent

2 more days of 15 hours or more of work and i m gonna take a break like finally.
so damn fucking tired laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
everyone thinks i should change a job.
but i just dont feel like doing so.
and i m smoking so much i m not aware of it myself till i realised how much i m spending on cigarettes.
i m just stressed up, tired and.... 
just cant discribe that.


missing someone whom i couldnt talk to terribly.
knowing it would be hopeless and yet going straight into a trap.
is this really how things should be.
all this is killing me.
keeping that feeling inside so long and so lonesome.
cause all that just doesnt seem to matter all the time.
falling and not fallen.
him is always just another person i guess.
):

Current Mood: sad

i  miss youuuuuuu.

 I cant believe there is actually such a post by me.

i never believe i would fall for anyone again, but i did.
You are amazing, i never realised that from the start.
i thought i got over you, but i never did.
i ran away hoping to give this feeling up, but i just couldnt.
Seeing you with another guy just made my days terrible.
loving you yet trying to let go.
long lingering feeling for you.
its been over a year of hide and seek,
unwilling to give in.
Over a year of trying,
Over a year of viewing your blog constantly hoping that you will be happy,
Over a year of longing for you.
i finally had the courage to text you using christmas eve as an excuse just to talk to you.
yes, you might thing all this is just a bunch of lies and bull-crap.
i dont blame you for that. 
but the truth still remains,
Iloveyou,
and i never felt more true saying this.

love, 
David

another post on me whining about my life.
things just cant get any better.
let me start off by saying work.
Khor is attach to Hong Kong for a month.
Kian Pong is back.
and i will be seeing more of work pretty soon.
when the new year past.
i dont wan an interesting life anymore.
this sucks.

went out with the usual people today.
every sat.
watched redline.
good racing show.
nadia bjorlin is hot.
i just find that it is getting harder and harder to clique with them.
thats why i intend to work on sat soon as well.
it is just hard to find someone of the same interest.
was suppose to go dxo and look for amanda but no one is going.
not a single known soul.
and what or who really is a friend, best friend.
i seriously got no idea.
maybe it is me.
i always try to give everything i can to my friends and hope that i will be treated the same way.
but sadly i guess that isnt the case.
things arent as simple as it seems.
i guess i really should cut off all connections with people.
and i realise i m less and less capable of handling people and approaching people.
and all the dick lovers of work as well.
i dont know what the fuck is wrong with me.

love.
i dont know what that is.
i thought i knew but i never did.
it isnt as simple as it seems.
i just dont wanna get hurt and vice versa.
it have always been hard for me to actually hurt someone.
i think i will die single.
ahha.
i just dont see someone i can really love like 5-10 years down the road
it is hard.
and everytime after i club i realise i dont like that someone i thought i did.
confused i am.
damn it.
all this things going through my head.

people i owe money to.
victor- 100
lemuel- 60
boon hock- 15
i guess thats all.
made plans to start working more and more.
and hopefully i hit my target of 6000 dollars in 3 and a half months.
haha.

things i wanna get.
macbook pro- 3k ++
ipod classic- approx 450
big birthday present for liz- approx. 500
mum and dad's ang bao- 200
april 77 jeans- 200
some clothes for new year- 300?

i think thats all.
selling my time for money. (:

pictures of it up on my friendster.
dvidd.li@hotmail.com
search for it! 

chalet made me lost 300 plus plus.
school fees 1065 to be exact.
victor 130.

felt like a loser.
it aint that bad.
mofo!

i m really sorry for being rude to you most of the times, i mean most of the times.
i m really thankful that you never gave up on me though dad have already did.
i m really grateful that you are always so concern; over concern about me.
i just want you to know i love you dearly though you always nag or shout at me.
deeply i know you care alot for me.
and i really didnt mean to be rude to you all the time.
its just that something is always troubling me.
you always took all my frustrations and not say a word about it.
dad have been stressing you about everything but you just kept it from me taking it all to you.
its just hard for me to live up to your expectations.
i just want to be something more.
making a name for myself and make you proud of me.
guilt overwhelms me for everything i had done that i shouldnt have.
tears streaming down my cheek as i wrote this.
yes i m a pussy.
SO WHAT PEOPLE! SO WHAT!
i m wrong. i m at fault.
i tried not to talk back to you.
i really did.
i did my best not to talk back to you.
but i know it isnt enough.
dont give up on me.
cause i really love you and i really do.

your son,
David, 
xoxo

Current Mood: guilty

i Miss bestfriend!!!

fuck kill me.
it isnt fun and imagine i have to stay at home the whole day tomorrow as well.
hahaa.
cause i m not working.
not gonna go dxo tomorrow.
hha.
finally gonna work on fri,
life is bored as usual.
wad is the life everyone says.
people often says that those who studies all the time have got no life.
but wad really is life?
Having fun? doing things you want? clubbing? drinking?
all those are wasting your precious life away.
cause frankly it just destroys your future.
who could study when there is fun.
i was a victim of all that shit.
and now i m serving my time in as a prisoner to it.
those who studies hard would have a good future and a good life ahead.
i mean they will get a good job.
find a good lover on the way.
get high pay.
support family.
everything goes on well.
but wad about those who seeks for "life" now and ends up as trash.
fuck it and die young they should.
i got no idea why i m saying this.
thoughts streaming in my head.
and no one sane enough lke my best friend to chat with me.
hahaa,
when are you coming back.
I miss youuuuuuuuuu.

went clubbing yesterday after work.
fuck i was tired and i club the whole night through.
crowd sucks.
dj sucks.
rather cocky.
chee bye stop talking on the mic when you are deejaying.
no one likes hearing your voice.
i mean rouge was a shit hole last night.
with lots of bengs and lians.
and AC got my newly bought top with her.
not like i really mind.
i hate the sight of red skinnies and bengs and lians in it.
i mean they don look good like they thought.
and i met lewis yesterdayt, i mean me and him could be good friends.
he is nice and friendly.
we both agree that bengs and lians in red sknnies are a disgrace or something and that the sight of it is irritating.
haha.
and my dear ying wen don push your friend to dance with me.
i was rude but i don care much,
i just don like the idea of grinding and dancing with strangers.
i mean whats so fun about grinding.
i just like dancing and having fun getting loose in the music.
aahaha.

went to newton for supper yesterday after clubbign.
i m rude to people i dislike.
shall not be mention.
really wanted to left earlier but only manages to get them to leave at liek 5 plus am.
like fuck i went clubbbing after work.
i was fucking shag.
chee bye.
went home with a fare of 19.20
but i tip the uncle 80 cents
haahha,

i m not a good blogger but i just like to blog about my thoughts and not what i do everyday.
cause that is lame and i prefer it this way.
i don blog often and thats a fact.
hahha

Current Location: home
Current Mood: calm
Current Music: Timberland

oh gosh.
man i m bored.
and i need company.
usual stuff as usual.
working.
i went out today to meet shaik to get our jump queue thingy for MCR concert.
HAHAHHAA.
i m gonna be in front.
hahaa.
suppe with pris kris shaik and rainer,
talking alot on the cab.
about love as usual.
PEOPLE's FAVOURITE TOPIC.
i wonder why.
talking about this subject makes me think alot and it is irritating.
i don like it.
and i mis my friends,